My feelings on The Demon Rush
Game Page: Doesn't exist yet
Chris 'Pootrain' Ferguson's PAL easy run
Verifier Responses
I completely forgot this guy was a verifier.
Decision: Accept
Reason: This is a fast run of a tough game.
Chris 'Pootrain' Ferguson's PAL easy run
Verifier Responses
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All the video and sound is captured well in all its 16bit glory.
I cant help but think if all the little mistakes and randomness went right in this run it could shave off another 2-3 minutes
But thats all I have negative to say about this run
I'm going to give this an weak accept.
I was anxious to see what strategies this run would employ for speed and it didnt dissapoint.
It was deathless.
It serves as a decent benchmark for those that feel it can be improved.
Overall, anyone watching this run will be impressed, dispite its few flaws
I cant help but think if all the little mistakes and randomness went right in this run it could shave off another 2-3 minutes
But thats all I have negative to say about this run
I'm going to give this an weak accept.
I was anxious to see what strategies this run would employ for speed and it didnt dissapoint.
It was deathless.
It serves as a decent benchmark for those that feel it can be improved.
Overall, anyone watching this run will be impressed, dispite its few flaws
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Verifier: btw i'm not sure if super star wars is that great of a run
Verifier: can't really remember
Verifier: but seems like he has bad luck at some spots
Verifier: and its on easy idk how much that matters or not
Verifier: yea idk super star wars is just meh to me
[23:51] mikwuyma: so you don't really care either way?
Verifier: on easy i feel like it should be a lot better
Verifier: for my standards
Verifier: because like, it really doesn't seem like that many spots you could lose a run
Verifier: so seems like his luck in certain spots could be better based on that
Verifier: like he seemed to waste a bunch of time in level 2
Verifier: i don't think 10 seconds would be hard to shave is what i'm basically saying
Verifier: i really would rather see a run on a different difficutly
Verifier: you take so much damage on easy
[23:54] mikwuyma: you mean you can take so much damage?
Verifier: even though its a hard ass game
Verifier: right you can take so much damage on easy
Verifier: like idk i just felt really meh about the whole run
Verifier: i don't really like it as a whole
Verifier: just feels like there is a ton of luck manipulation you can have in this run
Verifier: so if you're not going to bother with it, might as well run it on a harder difficulty
Verifier: can't really remember
Verifier: but seems like he has bad luck at some spots
Verifier: and its on easy idk how much that matters or not
Verifier: yea idk super star wars is just meh to me
[23:51] mikwuyma: so you don't really care either way?
Verifier: on easy i feel like it should be a lot better
Verifier: for my standards
Verifier: because like, it really doesn't seem like that many spots you could lose a run
Verifier: so seems like his luck in certain spots could be better based on that
Verifier: like he seemed to waste a bunch of time in level 2
Verifier: i don't think 10 seconds would be hard to shave is what i'm basically saying
Verifier: i really would rather see a run on a different difficutly
Verifier: you take so much damage on easy
[23:54] mikwuyma: you mean you can take so much damage?
Verifier: even though its a hard ass game
Verifier: right you can take so much damage on easy
Verifier: like idk i just felt really meh about the whole run
Verifier: i don't really like it as a whole
Verifier: just feels like there is a ton of luck manipulation you can have in this run
Verifier: so if you're not going to bother with it, might as well run it on a harder difficulty
Quote:
Video and audio look fine
No Cheating found
I am so glad someone finally got around to doing a run of this game, even though it is on PAL. Maybe this will spark interest in people doing the NTSC version, too. Anyway, my comments per level. Some of what I'll say is kind of a repeat of some of the runners own comments, but these are my two cents regardless.
Dune Sea:
Since most of the mistakes you already mentioned in your comments, I thought it was a very smooth level otherwise. That's pretty cool that you're able to go through the pink worm things just by shooting as they come out of the ground and keep sliding; saves some time. I guess there's no way to keep the boss out of the ground longer, at least without losing too much life, right? I mean, you did a hell of a lot of damage to it the first time, but after that it wasn't out of the ground long.
Ride towards Sandcrawler:
I agree, these levels can be a bitch. Since it is the second level, though, if it was possible to get a better spawning of some of these guys (even though a lot of them were well placed) you could save a few seconds probably by manipulating some more. Otherwise, you handled this level very well.
Outside Sandcrawler:
This level always gave me trouble in the past. You executed your jumps extremely well considering all the crap that can shoot at you and push you back.
Inside Sandcrawler:
The biggest concern for me here is when you were at the part with the moving turrets. That one you got stuck on, you probably could have waited a second for it to come back. Otherwise, the miniboss was done very well (I had no idea about that strategy), and being able to skip the boss is incredible!
Land of the Sandpeople:
Don't you just love the knockback in this game?... It's like they're all made of rubber, as far back as you go when you run into an enemy. Would it have been faster though, to have just walked to Obi-Won, instead of sliding into him and bouncing back? Or do you get the same result either way? I didn't really see any significant problems in this level, otherwise.
Land of the Banthas:
I can't see much room for improvement here either since you already said it takes luck from the last sandperson to beat the boss easier with the lightsaber. I personally don't remember getting the shield that much, if at all, right before the boss either. How did you keep the boss from coming back forwards and hurting you with its hands while you were just shooting at it, though? Does the lightsaber really push it back that far?
Head Towards Mos Eisley:
There's got to be a better strategy for getting those damn Jawas to come at you better. Would it have helped to move more in the beginning than you did? I thought they are more likely to come at you the more you move forward? This game isn't that long. Some more luck manipulation could help the time more, I think. Missing a couple of the Jawas that came at you was also not good, and cost a fair amount of time waiting for them to come back on screen. This is probably one of the more improvable levels of the run, but you did decently despite the bad luck.
Mos Eisley:
Spikey grass! Who knew there was grass that could kill you, haha. The two thermal detonators and the shield really saved your ass here. Even though there were a few mistakes here and there, this level was done well.
Cantina Fight:
I'm a little surprised this level never cost you a lot of runs, as close as you were to death at the boss. This level is fine, other than you should have put the detonator to better use at the beginning, since it wasn't about to disappear at that time.
Escape from Mos Eisley:
The biggest mistake here is getting slowed down by that seeker gun, but what are you going to do? I like your strategy with the boss, but you probably could have taken a few more risks near the end, maybe? Meaning, killing the last two sections a bit faster.
Death Star Hangar Bay:
Yeah, good level.
Rescue the Princess:
One bad fall, but that wasn't a huge loss of time. A little better movement in the tunnel levels (jumping over more of the round drones more efficiently), but otherwise fine.
Tractor Beam Core:
I don't remember waiting for that one platform 3 times before, but I could be wrong. I call bad luck on that part mostly. I suggest getting a new controller for future runs, after seeing that boss fight :p.
Space Mission:
I can't think of a better strategy for this area other than what you already did.
Trench Mission: Don't give up, trust your instincts! Do a Barrel Roll! (Yes, I have nothing more to say other than Star Fox 64 quotes here, lol).
Verdict: Accept
Very good run overall. With more luck, obviously some time could be cut off from the Jawa missions, and better movement in levels (jumping over enemies after sliding mostly) could be more efficient, but I know how clunky these controls can be at times. Good luck with any future runs on this, or any of the other parts of the trilogy!
No Cheating found
I am so glad someone finally got around to doing a run of this game, even though it is on PAL. Maybe this will spark interest in people doing the NTSC version, too. Anyway, my comments per level. Some of what I'll say is kind of a repeat of some of the runners own comments, but these are my two cents regardless.
Dune Sea:
Since most of the mistakes you already mentioned in your comments, I thought it was a very smooth level otherwise. That's pretty cool that you're able to go through the pink worm things just by shooting as they come out of the ground and keep sliding; saves some time. I guess there's no way to keep the boss out of the ground longer, at least without losing too much life, right? I mean, you did a hell of a lot of damage to it the first time, but after that it wasn't out of the ground long.
Ride towards Sandcrawler:
I agree, these levels can be a bitch. Since it is the second level, though, if it was possible to get a better spawning of some of these guys (even though a lot of them were well placed) you could save a few seconds probably by manipulating some more. Otherwise, you handled this level very well.
Outside Sandcrawler:
This level always gave me trouble in the past. You executed your jumps extremely well considering all the crap that can shoot at you and push you back.
Inside Sandcrawler:
The biggest concern for me here is when you were at the part with the moving turrets. That one you got stuck on, you probably could have waited a second for it to come back. Otherwise, the miniboss was done very well (I had no idea about that strategy), and being able to skip the boss is incredible!
Land of the Sandpeople:
Don't you just love the knockback in this game?... It's like they're all made of rubber, as far back as you go when you run into an enemy. Would it have been faster though, to have just walked to Obi-Won, instead of sliding into him and bouncing back? Or do you get the same result either way? I didn't really see any significant problems in this level, otherwise.
Land of the Banthas:
I can't see much room for improvement here either since you already said it takes luck from the last sandperson to beat the boss easier with the lightsaber. I personally don't remember getting the shield that much, if at all, right before the boss either. How did you keep the boss from coming back forwards and hurting you with its hands while you were just shooting at it, though? Does the lightsaber really push it back that far?
Head Towards Mos Eisley:
There's got to be a better strategy for getting those damn Jawas to come at you better. Would it have helped to move more in the beginning than you did? I thought they are more likely to come at you the more you move forward? This game isn't that long. Some more luck manipulation could help the time more, I think. Missing a couple of the Jawas that came at you was also not good, and cost a fair amount of time waiting for them to come back on screen. This is probably one of the more improvable levels of the run, but you did decently despite the bad luck.
Mos Eisley:
Spikey grass! Who knew there was grass that could kill you, haha. The two thermal detonators and the shield really saved your ass here. Even though there were a few mistakes here and there, this level was done well.
Cantina Fight:
I'm a little surprised this level never cost you a lot of runs, as close as you were to death at the boss. This level is fine, other than you should have put the detonator to better use at the beginning, since it wasn't about to disappear at that time.
Escape from Mos Eisley:
The biggest mistake here is getting slowed down by that seeker gun, but what are you going to do? I like your strategy with the boss, but you probably could have taken a few more risks near the end, maybe? Meaning, killing the last two sections a bit faster.
Death Star Hangar Bay:
Yeah, good level.
Rescue the Princess:
One bad fall, but that wasn't a huge loss of time. A little better movement in the tunnel levels (jumping over more of the round drones more efficiently), but otherwise fine.
Tractor Beam Core:
I don't remember waiting for that one platform 3 times before, but I could be wrong. I call bad luck on that part mostly. I suggest getting a new controller for future runs, after seeing that boss fight :p.
Space Mission:
I can't think of a better strategy for this area other than what you already did.
Trench Mission: Don't give up, trust your instincts! Do a Barrel Roll! (Yes, I have nothing more to say other than Star Fox 64 quotes here, lol).
Verdict: Accept
Very good run overall. With more luck, obviously some time could be cut off from the Jawa missions, and better movement in levels (jumping over enemies after sliding mostly) could be more efficient, but I know how clunky these controls can be at times. Good luck with any future runs on this, or any of the other parts of the trilogy!
I completely forgot this guy was a verifier.
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Time to serve up the third in my unique brand of verifier commentary not seen anywhere else, unless someone decides to be a copycat which isn't too farfetched a possiblity. My goal? To dish out the most unique verifier commentary ever seen.
WARNING: The following commentary is not suitable for all viewers. And I do mean all viewers.
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Dear People,
So, a stupid amount of time ago (okay, actually like 4 months), I signed on to verify a run of Super Star Wars for the SNES. These games were classic - run and gun, and hard as hell. The running man combats this by chosing the easy difficulty. He's no Jedi at all! But hey, it's finally here, so we may as well party hard! For now, only...five others? MGS:PO got four others, and Dracula X only got two. So...uhh...that just goes to show you just how kickass these games are! Though they're overshadowed today in favor of games like KOTOR.
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Remember me? I'm your trusty (yet mentally disturbed) verifier, who sets out to entertain viewers with crazy (yet informative) commentary on speed runs that are verified. Otherwise known as Yours Truly. You may or may not like me, but here I am! And I'm gonna rock you not like a hurricane, but better!
So Super Star Wars. I covered this in my introductary paragraph, but I'll cover it some more, just because. It's a run and gun game, except you also get to use a lightsaber that kinda sucks (gun beats sword, especially if said sword can't be used to block anything!). It's on the Super Nintendo, like the title implies. Some people say that Sega does what Nintendon't. Well, SNES is what Genesisn't, so they can go suck a cock for all I care.
This is the first in the Super Star Wars series; this one covers the first Star Wars, aka A New Hope. There are also games for The Empire Strikes Back and Return of the Jedi, which are significantly harder. Why? Well, the bosses! They all have lots of health and can kill you faster than you can say "what the fuck was that?" Sure, you get more powerups, including a better lightsaber and the force, but still! This game is comparatively simpler, though still just as difficult at times. Especially with the last level on Jedi - way too many goddamned fireballs come at you, and you have to shoot them all. Damned if it doesn't feel good, though! There's worse, though - like the one asshole flying thing - where if you die and get reverted to the standard gun(s), you're screwed, even on easy!
Hmm...can I carry on some more? Ehh...not really. Oh, maybe I can now. So uhh...how 'bout that Michael Jackson? Did you know that he helped with some of the music on Sonic 3? Yeah - now you'll be reminded and become sad every time you play it! Wait, shit, now I'm reminded! FUCK! Why did I even bring it up!? That has nothing to do with anything! WHY DID YOU HAVE TO DIE SO SOON MICHAEL? WHHHHHHYYYYYYY...wait, I remember why I might've made that conncetion. The music! The music's good in this game and are renditions of the movie's music in glorious 16-bit. Just like in Michael Jackson's Moonwalker (by the way, someone run that in honor of him). Also by the way, no matter what the Angry Video Game Nerd says, it's still a good game and fun to play. Also also by the way, I noticed the nerd's an idiot at times. He doesn't seem to realize a lot of things in games. "I JUST PUSH THE BUTTONS." Yeah, that recurring line pretty much alerts you to the fact that you can't trust the guy on the finer details of gameplay...the phrase "blind rage" has never, EVER been more applicable! Nor has...uhh...whatever the fuck the terms for not having you and/or friend dress up and act just like you are.
But that's a different story! The real story is...wait, what was it?
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Oh right, Super Star Wars on the SNES. The nerd praised those, by the way, though never went into the difficulty of them (self-censorship, much)?
So anyway, yeah. So Star Wars takes place in a far-off galaxy in the distant past, and was created during a time where George Lucas was being (rightfully) held back by others. The problem with the prequel trilogy was simply that no one was there to say, "no George, you can't do that", leading to all sorts of stupidity. Even the original trilogy suffered because of it (see: Greedo shoots first, Hayden showing up as Vader's force ghost, etc.)! If there's an official name for the syndrome, I don't know it, but I do know that Vince Russo suffers from it too. Fortunately, the guys at LucasArts subscribed to the "no George, you can't do that", and the game is faithful to the movie - with slight but right changes to accomodate a game!
Now? Okay, now. Let's go, verification ho! Time to watch, for every botch! I will view, this rose or pee-EWW! Be you black, white, or orange...shit. But anyway, no matter the color of your skin, prepare yourself! As usual, I will remind the audience that it is so over the top that I will again mention it is not suitable for all viewers.
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Bomb Squad 1: Duned to Recession
Lovely start right here. The running man doesn't run, but he sure slides a lot. Past everything. Even the giant scorpions which can somehow magically split into two are shot then slid under during the split!
By the way, Sarlaccs are apparantly giant worms with tentacles that shoot rocks. The boss could've been done faster...COULD'VE! There's a catch of gargantuan propertions in the form of having to spend an eternity killing scorpions and mutant frogs who are minding their own business, though, and THAT'S NO GOOD! So the simple second stage weapon works fine.
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Bomb Squad 2: Uhh...Level 2.
And this is where the run falls into the proverbial shitter for one level. This level is done more poorly than the steak I had last night. But whereas my steak was delicious because of it, this level is just garbage! For you unfortunate souls who happen to be in the dark about it, the idea is you're speeding around in some vehicle with C3PO and have to kill a bunch of Jawas who are riding around on god-knows-what because the game said so. I never really understood what Jawas are supposed to be. I mean, under their hoods. There probably is an official explanation somewhere, but I can't be assed to find it. Anyway, the Jawas ride around on their...chair things?...and throw the weirdest looking explosives I have ever seen in a video game at you. Okay, ninth weirdest. Rough estimate. And you have to kill them. Because like I said, the game said so. And whatever the game says, goes...
Unfortunately, the running man is a pussy or a pacifist, and instead of just holding down fire, he waits for the right moment to shoot...and misses some guys he should've had easily because of it.
He also is extremely unfamiliar with proper proceedure for dealing with the god-knows-what riding Jawas. It's in "lovely Mode 7" as you described, man! You can move in THREE DIMENSIONS! Move back while shooting to make sure the Jawas don't get behind you! God damn!
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Bomb Squad 3: Up
So now our hero has to climb up the Jawa Sandcrawler and invade their personal living space. And by climb, I mean jump. Speaking of jumps, the running man doesn't seem to realize that you can barely make it over to the still platforms when on the second level. That's just unacceptable! But he makes up for it by totally destroying the part with the Turrets From Hell, infamous for taking off way more health than they should.
Aw, who am I kidding? IT'S STILL UNACCEPTABLE! Why not do both!? Everything else goes nicely, but still, what the hell man!?
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Bomb Squad 4: In
Not an impressive start. Pussy pacifist running man does his thing again when he encounters the...damn it, what the hell is with all these indescribable mechancial objects in this game?! They sort of look like cranes, but they're not. Fuck! Anyway, there are drills of doom(tm) below the cranes, but they're not, and in the process of trying to merely avoid the cranes, he gets caught up on the drills of doom and gets pushed around by a crane, but it's not.
Wanna know what he does next?
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He...tries to get by anyway!
DUN DUN DUNNNNNNNN!!!!!!!!
Oh, and did I mention he fails?
DUN DUN DUN DUNNNNNNNN!!!!!!!!
DUN DUN DUN DUNNNNNNNN!!!!!!!!
So because of pussy pacifism, the running man not only gets shoved around by a crane, but it's not, while standing on the drills of doom(tm), but he also wastes time! Why not just shoot it and have done with it!? Lag?!?! LAG DON'T MATTER WHEN YOU SLOW, BRO!
The rest goes fine, but the shit stands out more than the not shit! Two things are interesting, though. First off, he gets by the bump bump bumpity bumpers without ever taking damage or stopping. He doesn't even stop for the basic laws of physics, and just goes right through them! Secondly, he also skips the giant evil deformed lava-borne Christmas tree by not scrolling the screen all the way down. That would've been impressive to me if I didn't predict it from the moment I saw him making sure the screen stayed up.
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Bomb Squad 5: SAND NIGGERS
The Sand People in Star Wars are humorously racist...heh heh heh...I ain't racist, boy, just sayin' it like it is. This bomb squad is half auto-scrolling, jumping across sets of rocks that look like they were extracted from a rock snake (Onix!?) and made to not give a fuck about gravity except half-assedly for around 2.3 seconds after stepping on some, where they slowly float down a little before FUCKING IMPLODING!
Not much else to say.
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Bomb Squad 6: SAND NIGGERS HAD THEIR LAND TAKEN OVER BY LIONS AND WEIRD FROG THINGS
The giant lions that FUCKING EXPLODE when killed FUCKING EXPLODE FUCKING QUICK. That's the good news. The bad news is, the running man got 4 of them instead of 3. Also, he acknowledges that the last Sandman can drop a shield which he can use to destroy the Mutant Wombat (wait, how the fuck did it even mutate like that?), but he fails. He should learn to stop and kill a few (it shouldn't take too too much time), because it really makes up for the time spent getting! I mean, Mutant Wombats aren't killed easily with guns! Everyone knows that! You gotta use a sword or at least an axe!
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7: Bomb Squad 7
See Bomb Squad 2. Only worse. "Could have been better" is the understatement of the moment. My ass. It could've kicked ass, but you're slower than slow!
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Bomb Squad 8 - Desert Hill
Not a fun level either in-game, or especially when you're a running man.
THERE IS SEVERE CHEATING IN THE RUN AT THIS POINT
Let me explain. You see, in this city, there seem to be an unusual amount of fatass giant lizards just chillin' out. Their eyes open and close, but otherwise are harmless. So, I ask you, the reader of these comments, WHAT THE FUCK ARE REPTILES DOING ON A PLANET THAT HAS TWO FUCKING SUNS!??!! Wait, is having two fucking suns even physically possible? That means there's even more SEVERE CHEATING in the run! First reptiles that can survive way past temperatures than any cold-blooded creature should be able to, and now this!
And who even owns these fatass lizards, anyway? Why are they stationed all over the city not doing anything in particular!? Don't they need to be fed or something? I mean, shit! It's not like life is particularly everywhere in the desert! All these fatass lizards are a waste! BUT THEY GET BY ANYWAY! There is no cheating on the part of the running man, but SEVERE CHEATING nonetheless!
The level goes as fast as can be expected, seeing as how the spiky desert grass 'o doom is all like "NO SLIDING ON THE GRASS" and the tops are like "NO SLIDING UP HERE CAUSE WE'LL THINK YOU'LL DROP THROUGH".
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Bomb Squad 9: KILL ALL THE HAITIANS IN THE BAR!!
The running man again proves his pussy pacifism by not killing the sorceror cloaked ninjas as fast as possible. If my memory serves me well (and it usually does, except for that one time), you can off them as soon as they start their jump animation from ever so slightly in the background to the forefront. Killing the enemies while waiting for the screen to scroll also seemed a little on the slow side.
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Bomb Squad 10: Hangarin' Around Bad People
The shadowed warrior makes a surprise appearance at the beginning, but is otherwise ignored. Poor choice of characters here - the UFO thing is better killed with Han or Luke. They aren't GIANT FUCKING WOOKIES, which is normally a good thing (furries notwithstanding, those scum, THOSE DAMNABLE SCUM!), but when the boss you're fighting likes to hang around low, it kind of screws you over.
Speaking of which, THE CLAW gets him. It's not like the claw in Toy Story on the Genesis where it is deadly, but it sure is deadly to the clock! Time is money, pal! And so less money for you! Then it's time for the money shots on the asshole flying thing. Remember him? If you die on him, you're screwed, even on easy!
More pussy pacifism is on display, for the whole wide world to see here! Instead of getting up close and personal with the asshole flying thing, the running scared man opts to hide in the corner, duck down, and try to shoot. That's just ineffective by comparison!
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Bomb Squad 11: TIE-DIE
Bah, taking it the slow and safe way is for pussies. Next time, you better slide the whole way through, except through holes. Hell, those little trash machines that only made a small appearance in the film but are fast-moving buggers who can push a character at equally fast speeds might be a good way to travel too! I mean, god damn, think like MacGuyver god damn it! The pussy way goes fairly decently, but pussy running man don't wanna take risks. ISN'T THAT WHAT SPEEDRUNNING IS ALL ABOUT!? TAKING RISKS AND DOING CRAZY THINGS TO GO FASTER!? I MEAN GOD DAMN.
What, it's not fun to slide into pits? Oh, boo hoo. Lots of speedrunners experience that lack of fun. You gotta be the guy if you wanna do well. The end result is worth it! WORTH IT I SAY! Nothing's stopping you! Well...you are...BUT NOTHING LIKE THE GRASS IN DESERT HILL! If whoever ran Battletoads can do it, so can you!
So never mind the nazis or the giant ships which can fly by without killing you! Go for it like a madman! Or a speedrunner. Wait, there's no difference! SO JUST GO FOR IT!
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Bomb Squad 12: Save the Princess, Save the Galaxy! Fuck the Princess, Fuck the Galaxy!
Damn it man, when you fuck up like that, you RESTART. Even if it's something like picking Chewie instead of Han! He's also smaller and so he can hit stuff better! And since he's smaller, you won't have to worry about getting knocked down vertical shafts as much! Sure, I mean he has the lowest health for some bizarre reason (shouldn't bounty hunters be HARDY?), but hey, it helps you, and you're gonna need the help!
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Bomb Squad 13: Up 2: ReUpped
Some of the mistakes here are laughable. One in particular costs at least 10 seconds. Possibly even more, depending on how long it took and how long I actually estimated it to be. Damn it, where are my crazy pills...YOURS TRULY NEEDS HIS CRAZY PILLS!
There, that's better. *ahem* Nothing further to report, and that makes yours truly truly sad. But hey! Nothing you can say! Nothing's gonna change what you've done to me (hey!)! Now it's time to shine...but what doesn't shine is the running man's "old and crusty SNES controlled D-pad". Oh, what's wrong pal, ya JACK OFF into it too much? I don't blame your controller - I blame YOU for not getting a better one! Don't blame the game either - you can get up there if you're fast enough. SPEED MAN! It's what this site is all about!
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Bomb Squad 14: HOLY SHIT X-WING SEGMENT
See Bomb Squad 2 and Bomb Squad 7. Only better, because this time he actually has an excuse in the form of the X-Wing travelling at mach 4000 (rough estimate), and the TIEs being obnoxiously, OBNOXIOUSLY difficult to hit. Still could've been faster - the instant death towers of terror are much easier to hit than TIEs, and the latter should've been given precident more! But hey, maybe I'm just being too demanding. Ya never know!
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Bomb Squad 15: HOLY SHIT PSEUDO-3D X-WING SEGMENT
Would you believe it? Pussy pacifist actually failed here once because he ran out of Photon Torpedos! I mean, it's not hard! "USE THE FORCE LUKE" *music starts* then you shoot them. You have no reason to use them otherwise. On that note, I'm not sure about this (wait, is my memory failing? BASTARDS!), but I believe you can shoot them as soon as the music changes, instead of waiting for the "distance to" to reach 0. At least make it look like that's not the case if not (the running man shoots around 4-5 early, though no harm no foul).
Maybe that's why he's a pussy pacifist? DUN DUN DUNNNNNN
But besides that quip, I can't really complain. There's nothing to mess up in this level! IT'S A GODDAMNED RAILSHOOTER, EXCEPT YOU HAVE TO SHOOT FIREBALLS! Then Darth Vader shows up for only 5 seconds (he stayed for much longer in the film!) before vanishing into thin air (his ship has cloaking device now!?), then you need to USE THE FORCE LUKE to fire the Photon Torpedos, but you have to be on-target because even though the auto-targetting system is off the force isn't that good. You've got 10, and the time is clear to fire them, but the running man still somehow messed it up.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Man, that doesn't feel good this time. It's just sad, in a pathetic, pity-inducing kind of way. It just isn't tragically hilarious like certain other runs...like...say...MISSING THE LAST ORB! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Now that always feels good to laugh about!
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Final Verdict:
Accept...able. Or is it Reject...worthy? I dunno. Somewhere in between Accept and Reject. Bomb Squads 2 and 7 seriously hurt the run. They look like lost baby platypuses in a flock of Canadian Geese. Other parts of the run just look slow, even if they're not. But there are good parts, even if they're not the fastest ways, even if I am a demanding man, and they make it not too too bad. DAMN IT! You just can't win.
I may have to bite the bullet and be a filthy neutral for this one. You may know where your enemies stand, but with me? Who knows? I don't even know myself! Well, like they say, majority rules, and I like that which rules. So I vote for whatever the majority is, except very weakly. I'd say "weak accept" outright out of wanting to see this run published, but that does not conform to any guideline I am aware of! But if it does...uhh...let's go with that I guess.
Hey, I guess it's not a bad thing that there are 5 others after all! That way, if all else fails, I won't get stuck with the deciding vote! Unless, of course, someone else decides to have a neutral vote too, which, in that case, I'll be forced to kill them.
Yours Truly,
Yours Truly
WARNING: The following commentary is not suitable for all viewers. And I do mean all viewers.
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Dear People,
So, a stupid amount of time ago (okay, actually like 4 months), I signed on to verify a run of Super Star Wars for the SNES. These games were classic - run and gun, and hard as hell. The running man combats this by chosing the easy difficulty. He's no Jedi at all! But hey, it's finally here, so we may as well party hard! For now, only...five others? MGS:PO got four others, and Dracula X only got two. So...uhh...that just goes to show you just how kickass these games are! Though they're overshadowed today in favor of games like KOTOR.
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Remember me? I'm your trusty (yet mentally disturbed) verifier, who sets out to entertain viewers with crazy (yet informative) commentary on speed runs that are verified. Otherwise known as Yours Truly. You may or may not like me, but here I am! And I'm gonna rock you not like a hurricane, but better!
So Super Star Wars. I covered this in my introductary paragraph, but I'll cover it some more, just because. It's a run and gun game, except you also get to use a lightsaber that kinda sucks (gun beats sword, especially if said sword can't be used to block anything!). It's on the Super Nintendo, like the title implies. Some people say that Sega does what Nintendon't. Well, SNES is what Genesisn't, so they can go suck a cock for all I care.
This is the first in the Super Star Wars series; this one covers the first Star Wars, aka A New Hope. There are also games for The Empire Strikes Back and Return of the Jedi, which are significantly harder. Why? Well, the bosses! They all have lots of health and can kill you faster than you can say "what the fuck was that?" Sure, you get more powerups, including a better lightsaber and the force, but still! This game is comparatively simpler, though still just as difficult at times. Especially with the last level on Jedi - way too many goddamned fireballs come at you, and you have to shoot them all. Damned if it doesn't feel good, though! There's worse, though - like the one asshole flying thing - where if you die and get reverted to the standard gun(s), you're screwed, even on easy!
Hmm...can I carry on some more? Ehh...not really. Oh, maybe I can now. So uhh...how 'bout that Michael Jackson? Did you know that he helped with some of the music on Sonic 3? Yeah - now you'll be reminded and become sad every time you play it! Wait, shit, now I'm reminded! FUCK! Why did I even bring it up!? That has nothing to do with anything! WHY DID YOU HAVE TO DIE SO SOON MICHAEL? WHHHHHHYYYYYYY...wait, I remember why I might've made that conncetion. The music! The music's good in this game and are renditions of the movie's music in glorious 16-bit. Just like in Michael Jackson's Moonwalker (by the way, someone run that in honor of him). Also by the way, no matter what the Angry Video Game Nerd says, it's still a good game and fun to play. Also also by the way, I noticed the nerd's an idiot at times. He doesn't seem to realize a lot of things in games. "I JUST PUSH THE BUTTONS." Yeah, that recurring line pretty much alerts you to the fact that you can't trust the guy on the finer details of gameplay...the phrase "blind rage" has never, EVER been more applicable! Nor has...uhh...whatever the fuck the terms for not having you and/or friend dress up and act just like you are.
But that's a different story! The real story is...wait, what was it?
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Oh right, Super Star Wars on the SNES. The nerd praised those, by the way, though never went into the difficulty of them (self-censorship, much)?
So anyway, yeah. So Star Wars takes place in a far-off galaxy in the distant past, and was created during a time where George Lucas was being (rightfully) held back by others. The problem with the prequel trilogy was simply that no one was there to say, "no George, you can't do that", leading to all sorts of stupidity. Even the original trilogy suffered because of it (see: Greedo shoots first, Hayden showing up as Vader's force ghost, etc.)! If there's an official name for the syndrome, I don't know it, but I do know that Vince Russo suffers from it too. Fortunately, the guys at LucasArts subscribed to the "no George, you can't do that", and the game is faithful to the movie - with slight but right changes to accomodate a game!
Now? Okay, now. Let's go, verification ho! Time to watch, for every botch! I will view, this rose or pee-EWW! Be you black, white, or orange...shit. But anyway, no matter the color of your skin, prepare yourself! As usual, I will remind the audience that it is so over the top that I will again mention it is not suitable for all viewers.
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Bomb Squad 1: Duned to Recession
Lovely start right here. The running man doesn't run, but he sure slides a lot. Past everything. Even the giant scorpions which can somehow magically split into two are shot then slid under during the split!
By the way, Sarlaccs are apparantly giant worms with tentacles that shoot rocks. The boss could've been done faster...COULD'VE! There's a catch of gargantuan propertions in the form of having to spend an eternity killing scorpions and mutant frogs who are minding their own business, though, and THAT'S NO GOOD! So the simple second stage weapon works fine.
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Bomb Squad 2: Uhh...Level 2.
And this is where the run falls into the proverbial shitter for one level. This level is done more poorly than the steak I had last night. But whereas my steak was delicious because of it, this level is just garbage! For you unfortunate souls who happen to be in the dark about it, the idea is you're speeding around in some vehicle with C3PO and have to kill a bunch of Jawas who are riding around on god-knows-what because the game said so. I never really understood what Jawas are supposed to be. I mean, under their hoods. There probably is an official explanation somewhere, but I can't be assed to find it. Anyway, the Jawas ride around on their...chair things?...and throw the weirdest looking explosives I have ever seen in a video game at you. Okay, ninth weirdest. Rough estimate. And you have to kill them. Because like I said, the game said so. And whatever the game says, goes...
Unfortunately, the running man is a pussy or a pacifist, and instead of just holding down fire, he waits for the right moment to shoot...and misses some guys he should've had easily because of it.
He also is extremely unfamiliar with proper proceedure for dealing with the god-knows-what riding Jawas. It's in "lovely Mode 7" as you described, man! You can move in THREE DIMENSIONS! Move back while shooting to make sure the Jawas don't get behind you! God damn!
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Bomb Squad 3: Up
So now our hero has to climb up the Jawa Sandcrawler and invade their personal living space. And by climb, I mean jump. Speaking of jumps, the running man doesn't seem to realize that you can barely make it over to the still platforms when on the second level. That's just unacceptable! But he makes up for it by totally destroying the part with the Turrets From Hell, infamous for taking off way more health than they should.
Aw, who am I kidding? IT'S STILL UNACCEPTABLE! Why not do both!? Everything else goes nicely, but still, what the hell man!?
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Bomb Squad 4: In
Not an impressive start. Pussy pacifist running man does his thing again when he encounters the...damn it, what the hell is with all these indescribable mechancial objects in this game?! They sort of look like cranes, but they're not. Fuck! Anyway, there are drills of doom(tm) below the cranes, but they're not, and in the process of trying to merely avoid the cranes, he gets caught up on the drills of doom and gets pushed around by a crane, but it's not.
Wanna know what he does next?
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He...tries to get by anyway!
DUN DUN DUNNNNNNNN!!!!!!!!
Oh, and did I mention he fails?
DUN DUN DUN DUNNNNNNNN!!!!!!!!
DUN DUN DUN DUNNNNNNNN!!!!!!!!
So because of pussy pacifism, the running man not only gets shoved around by a crane, but it's not, while standing on the drills of doom(tm), but he also wastes time! Why not just shoot it and have done with it!? Lag?!?! LAG DON'T MATTER WHEN YOU SLOW, BRO!
The rest goes fine, but the shit stands out more than the not shit! Two things are interesting, though. First off, he gets by the bump bump bumpity bumpers without ever taking damage or stopping. He doesn't even stop for the basic laws of physics, and just goes right through them! Secondly, he also skips the giant evil deformed lava-borne Christmas tree by not scrolling the screen all the way down. That would've been impressive to me if I didn't predict it from the moment I saw him making sure the screen stayed up.
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Bomb Squad 5: SAND NIGGERS
The Sand People in Star Wars are humorously racist...heh heh heh...I ain't racist, boy, just sayin' it like it is. This bomb squad is half auto-scrolling, jumping across sets of rocks that look like they were extracted from a rock snake (Onix!?) and made to not give a fuck about gravity except half-assedly for around 2.3 seconds after stepping on some, where they slowly float down a little before FUCKING IMPLODING!
Not much else to say.
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Bomb Squad 6: SAND NIGGERS HAD THEIR LAND TAKEN OVER BY LIONS AND WEIRD FROG THINGS
The giant lions that FUCKING EXPLODE when killed FUCKING EXPLODE FUCKING QUICK. That's the good news. The bad news is, the running man got 4 of them instead of 3. Also, he acknowledges that the last Sandman can drop a shield which he can use to destroy the Mutant Wombat (wait, how the fuck did it even mutate like that?), but he fails. He should learn to stop and kill a few (it shouldn't take too too much time), because it really makes up for the time spent getting! I mean, Mutant Wombats aren't killed easily with guns! Everyone knows that! You gotta use a sword or at least an axe!
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7: Bomb Squad 7
See Bomb Squad 2. Only worse. "Could have been better" is the understatement of the moment. My ass. It could've kicked ass, but you're slower than slow!
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Bomb Squad 8 - Desert Hill
Not a fun level either in-game, or especially when you're a running man.
THERE IS SEVERE CHEATING IN THE RUN AT THIS POINT
Let me explain. You see, in this city, there seem to be an unusual amount of fatass giant lizards just chillin' out. Their eyes open and close, but otherwise are harmless. So, I ask you, the reader of these comments, WHAT THE FUCK ARE REPTILES DOING ON A PLANET THAT HAS TWO FUCKING SUNS!??!! Wait, is having two fucking suns even physically possible? That means there's even more SEVERE CHEATING in the run! First reptiles that can survive way past temperatures than any cold-blooded creature should be able to, and now this!
And who even owns these fatass lizards, anyway? Why are they stationed all over the city not doing anything in particular!? Don't they need to be fed or something? I mean, shit! It's not like life is particularly everywhere in the desert! All these fatass lizards are a waste! BUT THEY GET BY ANYWAY! There is no cheating on the part of the running man, but SEVERE CHEATING nonetheless!
The level goes as fast as can be expected, seeing as how the spiky desert grass 'o doom is all like "NO SLIDING ON THE GRASS" and the tops are like "NO SLIDING UP HERE CAUSE WE'LL THINK YOU'LL DROP THROUGH".
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Bomb Squad 9: KILL ALL THE HAITIANS IN THE BAR!!
The running man again proves his pussy pacifism by not killing the sorceror cloaked ninjas as fast as possible. If my memory serves me well (and it usually does, except for that one time), you can off them as soon as they start their jump animation from ever so slightly in the background to the forefront. Killing the enemies while waiting for the screen to scroll also seemed a little on the slow side.
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Bomb Squad 10: Hangarin' Around Bad People
The shadowed warrior makes a surprise appearance at the beginning, but is otherwise ignored. Poor choice of characters here - the UFO thing is better killed with Han or Luke. They aren't GIANT FUCKING WOOKIES, which is normally a good thing (furries notwithstanding, those scum, THOSE DAMNABLE SCUM!), but when the boss you're fighting likes to hang around low, it kind of screws you over.
Speaking of which, THE CLAW gets him. It's not like the claw in Toy Story on the Genesis where it is deadly, but it sure is deadly to the clock! Time is money, pal! And so less money for you! Then it's time for the money shots on the asshole flying thing. Remember him? If you die on him, you're screwed, even on easy!
More pussy pacifism is on display, for the whole wide world to see here! Instead of getting up close and personal with the asshole flying thing, the running scared man opts to hide in the corner, duck down, and try to shoot. That's just ineffective by comparison!
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Bomb Squad 11: TIE-DIE
Bah, taking it the slow and safe way is for pussies. Next time, you better slide the whole way through, except through holes. Hell, those little trash machines that only made a small appearance in the film but are fast-moving buggers who can push a character at equally fast speeds might be a good way to travel too! I mean, god damn, think like MacGuyver god damn it! The pussy way goes fairly decently, but pussy running man don't wanna take risks. ISN'T THAT WHAT SPEEDRUNNING IS ALL ABOUT!? TAKING RISKS AND DOING CRAZY THINGS TO GO FASTER!? I MEAN GOD DAMN.
What, it's not fun to slide into pits? Oh, boo hoo. Lots of speedrunners experience that lack of fun. You gotta be the guy if you wanna do well. The end result is worth it! WORTH IT I SAY! Nothing's stopping you! Well...you are...BUT NOTHING LIKE THE GRASS IN DESERT HILL! If whoever ran Battletoads can do it, so can you!
So never mind the nazis or the giant ships which can fly by without killing you! Go for it like a madman! Or a speedrunner. Wait, there's no difference! SO JUST GO FOR IT!
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Bomb Squad 12: Save the Princess, Save the Galaxy! Fuck the Princess, Fuck the Galaxy!
Damn it man, when you fuck up like that, you RESTART. Even if it's something like picking Chewie instead of Han! He's also smaller and so he can hit stuff better! And since he's smaller, you won't have to worry about getting knocked down vertical shafts as much! Sure, I mean he has the lowest health for some bizarre reason (shouldn't bounty hunters be HARDY?), but hey, it helps you, and you're gonna need the help!
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Bomb Squad 13: Up 2: ReUpped
Some of the mistakes here are laughable. One in particular costs at least 10 seconds. Possibly even more, depending on how long it took and how long I actually estimated it to be. Damn it, where are my crazy pills...YOURS TRULY NEEDS HIS CRAZY PILLS!
There, that's better. *ahem* Nothing further to report, and that makes yours truly truly sad. But hey! Nothing you can say! Nothing's gonna change what you've done to me (hey!)! Now it's time to shine...but what doesn't shine is the running man's "old and crusty SNES controlled D-pad". Oh, what's wrong pal, ya JACK OFF into it too much? I don't blame your controller - I blame YOU for not getting a better one! Don't blame the game either - you can get up there if you're fast enough. SPEED MAN! It's what this site is all about!
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Bomb Squad 14: HOLY SHIT X-WING SEGMENT
See Bomb Squad 2 and Bomb Squad 7. Only better, because this time he actually has an excuse in the form of the X-Wing travelling at mach 4000 (rough estimate), and the TIEs being obnoxiously, OBNOXIOUSLY difficult to hit. Still could've been faster - the instant death towers of terror are much easier to hit than TIEs, and the latter should've been given precident more! But hey, maybe I'm just being too demanding. Ya never know!
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Bomb Squad 15: HOLY SHIT PSEUDO-3D X-WING SEGMENT
Would you believe it? Pussy pacifist actually failed here once because he ran out of Photon Torpedos! I mean, it's not hard! "USE THE FORCE LUKE" *music starts* then you shoot them. You have no reason to use them otherwise. On that note, I'm not sure about this (wait, is my memory failing? BASTARDS!), but I believe you can shoot them as soon as the music changes, instead of waiting for the "distance to" to reach 0. At least make it look like that's not the case if not (the running man shoots around 4-5 early, though no harm no foul).
Maybe that's why he's a pussy pacifist? DUN DUN DUNNNNNN
But besides that quip, I can't really complain. There's nothing to mess up in this level! IT'S A GODDAMNED RAILSHOOTER, EXCEPT YOU HAVE TO SHOOT FIREBALLS! Then Darth Vader shows up for only 5 seconds (he stayed for much longer in the film!) before vanishing into thin air (his ship has cloaking device now!?), then you need to USE THE FORCE LUKE to fire the Photon Torpedos, but you have to be on-target because even though the auto-targetting system is off the force isn't that good. You've got 10, and the time is clear to fire them, but the running man still somehow messed it up.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Man, that doesn't feel good this time. It's just sad, in a pathetic, pity-inducing kind of way. It just isn't tragically hilarious like certain other runs...like...say...MISSING THE LAST ORB! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Now that always feels good to laugh about!
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Final Verdict:
Accept...able. Or is it Reject...worthy? I dunno. Somewhere in between Accept and Reject. Bomb Squads 2 and 7 seriously hurt the run. They look like lost baby platypuses in a flock of Canadian Geese. Other parts of the run just look slow, even if they're not. But there are good parts, even if they're not the fastest ways, even if I am a demanding man, and they make it not too too bad. DAMN IT! You just can't win.
I may have to bite the bullet and be a filthy neutral for this one. You may know where your enemies stand, but with me? Who knows? I don't even know myself! Well, like they say, majority rules, and I like that which rules. So I vote for whatever the majority is, except very weakly. I'd say "weak accept" outright out of wanting to see this run published, but that does not conform to any guideline I am aware of! But if it does...uhh...let's go with that I guess.
Hey, I guess it's not a bad thing that there are 5 others after all! That way, if all else fails, I won't get stuck with the deciding vote! Unless, of course, someone else decides to have a neutral vote too, which, in that case, I'll be forced to kill them.
Yours Truly,
Yours Truly
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This run is super and very well done. Audio and video are okay. It's SNES so I wasn't expecting much. His strategies are top notch and he does it all without dying, which is a feat in itself if you've ever played this game. Lastly the glitch in the sand crawler where he completely skipped the lava beast or whatever it is was pure win! I hated beating it and now that I know I hope it works in the NA version.
If the runner should read this, in regards to what you said in your comments about the other games in the series. Yes they are harder... very harder.
Accept, no doubt!!!!
If the runner should read this, in regards to what you said in your comments about the other games in the series. Yes they are harder... very harder.
Accept, no doubt!!!!
Decision: Accept
Reason: This is a fast run of a tough game.
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